i’ve been so busy recently that i keep finding myself thinking over and over, i don’t have time…for talking to friends, to lie down and take a rest, to try a new recipe, to blog, to sit quietly with my man…but thinking about my life that way doesn’t help me to live in my life now. it’s a story that makes it hard to live now.
right now i can smell the onions i’m caramelizing in the crockpot–that’s a new fun kitchen adventure! right now, i notice my jaw is tight and i am sitting in my cozy nook with a heating pad, surrounded by books and projects and flowers. the christmas cactus has been blooming for about a week now and it’s gorgeous! dusk is falling. i sense myself here, embodied, here, right now. right now there is time. time is now.
and this weekend, being more aware of the moment, of now, i have enjoyed the kitchen bounty–the tomatoes i harvested green from the garden last month are ripening, i just picked the last of the chard out from under the snow, and there’s still lots of kale. i don’t have to do anything more right now. right now i am writing this and that is all i need to pay attention to. my fingers on the keypad, still tension in my jaw, my body settled, supported. here, now. here, now. herenowherenowhwerenowherenow. here now.
so, here’s what’s cooking in the crockpot: carmelized onions (just chop them up and put them in with some butter, salt, and pepper. mine have been cooking about 2.5 hours on high and they are getting there.). and i just threw some of that garden chard in, chopped up to finish cooking wtih the onions. i’m planning to make a tomato tart with the onion/chard on the bottom and slices of fresh tomatos with feta, perhaps cheese on the top. but that’s later. right now, i’m here, typing, munching on cheese curds and crackers.
where are you now? are you here? what is the texture of your here now?
bye now, katy