return to the most human

Return to the Most Human by May Sarton
Return to the most human,
nothing less will nourish the torn spirit,
the bewildered heart,
the angry mind:
and from the ultimate duress,
pierced with the breath of anguish,
speak of love.

Return, return to the deep sources,
nothing less will teach the stiff hands a new way to serve,
to carve into our lives the forms of tenderness
and still that ancient necessary pain preserve.

Return to the most human,
nothing less will teach the angry spirit,
the bewildered heart;
the torn mind,
to accept the whole of its duress,
and pierced with anguish…
at last, act for love.

Winter and Spring,

Lent and Easter,

the Hero’s and Heroine’s Journeys,

the Bodhisattvas, who, once enlightened, choose to stay on earth to accompany us,

the under- and over-world travel of shamans and goddesses throughout time…

This paradox of season and cycle, of rhythmic journey has meaning.

We are again and again invited
to return to the most human—
both in our deep-diving
and in our high-flying.

We go down, we go in, we go through.

We stay. We keep vigil. We are held.

We are shown the way—sometimes
only one step at a time.

The way of being human includes all of this.

Darkness. The torn spirit. The bewildered heart. The angry mind.

Light. The rejoicing spirit. The grateful heart. The blissful mind.

The Unknown-ness. The Mystery. The I-don’t-know-how-ness.

For only in this most human place,

lovingly abiding with our darkness,

can the body be a chalice
connecting earth and heaven,
 so that we can at last arise and act for love.

Smile into Spring

Smile.

Yes, right now, just try it on your face.

Notice how you feel right now.

For me it’s instantly softer, more joyous, more at ease. Right. Now.

As we teach in Laughter Yoga, just the simple act of intentional smiling and laughter sparks the feel-good neuro-transmitters in the brain. You immediately feel more connected, happy, and pleasured.

Who doesn’t want more of that?

Spring Equinox is here today,
Tuesday March 20th, 2018
at 11:15 am CT.

Especially in the northern climes, like Minnesota where I live, spring helps us smile again!

On Sunday, I hosted a Tea & Poetry Gathering. Just hearing the spring-themed poems that welcomed “rushing rain,” “wild spring,” “this earth is our heaven,” “buds bursting on the trees,” “the encouragement of light,” the “frolic,” and the invitation to the heart to “rave on” helped my bodysoul “step into spring.”

Spring always invites us to start fresh, to begin again, to welcome the new green life awakening deep within.

Why not use this natural, seasonal impulse to re-fresh and re-source our lives instead of waiting for a crisis to do it for us?

We can re-orient in so many different ways. Today, I offer just a few:

  • Try my new gluten-free, dairy-free, nut-free Breakfast Muffins recipe for a simple, healthy start to your day.
  • Try on the Smiling Practice below, that you can do anytime in your day, to choose new, fresh, yummy life!

Smiling Practice

“Sometimes your joy is the source
of your smile, and sometimes your smile
is the source of your joy.”
~ Thich Nhat Hanh

For more awareness, close your eyes, but this can be done with them open or closed.

Let a smile start on your lips–draw the corners of your lips up toward your ears slowly. Notice how, if you let it, the smile naturally broadens and widens, taking up more of your face. Feel how it resets and refreshes your brain. Take a few breaths here, sensing your body.

Now smile into your heart–start at the center of your chest and imagine the smile spreading out from there, up toward your breasts (or pecs) and all the way to your shoulders, filling your chest with this joyful, easeful energy. Breathe in and out, sensing and feeling.

Now smile into your belly–from your pubic bone, let the smile widen out and up toward your hip bones. Imagine bathing all of your lower belly organs in this goodness and well-being. Breathe, feel, and sense…

Breathe into all three Centers–Belly, Heart, and Head, starting in the center–pubic bone, center of chest, lips–and let the breath spread the smile in each Center, filling you up with yumminess. On the inbreath, breathe the smile into being, on the outbreath, release any efforting. Stay here, smiling, breathing, sensing, and feeling as long as you choose, and then bring this sweet moment of awakening to your true nature back into your day.

a thousand ways…

What does it mean to be awake?

An age-old question, for sure.

If things aren’t going wrong in our lives, we sometimes don’t even know that we’re not very awake.

It can be so easy to glide along in the comfortable illusion of awakeness.

  • I’m fine. 
  • I don’t let my partner’s idiosyncrasies bother me.
  • I swallow back my frustration when the children act out.
  • I know how to self-medicate with chocolate, alcohol, TV, sleep, or …

But there is more possible!

What if you felt your irritation rise up, understood its connection to your past, and, instead of swallowing down frustration, responded to your children with attunement, helping them navigate their emotions?

What if you had integrated the connection to your own needs and concerns, instead of inwardly cringing, when your partner does something a little whacky, thus opening up the awareness of her/his precious individual expression?

What if you had energy to savor your life—every drop of it, instead of numbing out to soothe yourself?

That’s what waking up
can open up in you!!

Waking up is not just a experience of the mind. Waking up involves all 3 Centers—Belly/Body, Heart, and Head.

Opening one Center can support the opening of the others. All are intimately intertwined in our awakening.

I recently read Brené Brown’s book Braving the Wildnerness, on what it takes to show up with awakeness in the world, in particular, in this political climate. I LOVED this concept:

Strong Back. Soft Front. Wild Heart.

As we awaken, we develop a strong and flexible spine—representing our will and ability to focus (Body and Head Centers)—instead of a rigidly over-protective back.

When our back is sturdy and flexible enough, instead of hardening or collapsing to protect a weak spine and defend from hurt, our front is open, soft and available to the world (Body and Heart Centers).

And within that soft front blossoms what Brené calls our Wild Heart. The Wild Heart is an awakening heart that is soft, open, and available to life’s beauty, chaos, unpredictability... Not numbed out or stuck in any one feeling, but able to respond to the paradox, feeling deeply and wildly available to life.

As Rumi says, “There are a thousand ways to
kneel and kiss the ground,” a thousand ways—and likely more—to practice waking up.

What are you working on in your life right
now that supports your waking up?

Happy Lenten Valentine’s Day!

I wonder when this happened last–Valentine’s Day falling on the first day of Lent!

The holiday that encourages voluptuous appetites, hedonistic pleasure, and over-the-top expressions of love.

AND the marking of 40 days in the desert wilderness–days of fasting, fastidious moral behavior, and going without.

What a beautiful paradox!!

Both of these extremes express
a yearning of the heart.

A yearning to find our way to our True Home–
to the Awakened Heart.

We can find our way in great pleasure and in great abstinence. Without indulging in either.

Sister Joan Chittister reminds us what Lent is really about:

“Lent is about becoming, doing, and changing whatever it is that is blocking the fullness of life in us right now.”

“The fullness of life” is Love.

We are invited today–on Lenten Valentine’s Day–to become, do, or change what is necessary to open to more Love.

Maybe that’s through flowers and chocolate and saying “I love you” to yourself and/or another.

Maybe it’s through daily prayer and removing [you name it] from your life.

You get to decide!

What will you practice?

with roots, we rise

magnificent trees, their root structure spreading
horizontally twice their height.

icebergs, 90% of their mass underwater.

deep sleep, providing the substrate for your body
to integrate, heal, and grow.

real, nourishing food, feeding your cells, cre
ating your bodies, emotions, and thoughts.

movement, pumping blood and air,
forming flesh and bone.

inner practice, deepening your connection
to your whole bodysoul.

These are the roots you need
to rise up and live your life.

Winter is the time to nourish your roots:

Listen to a grounding meditation to deepen your inner roots.

Try my Parsnip-Burdock Breakfast Bowl to feed your belly roots.

Join me at Wild Church!

Are you self-full?

Woman in Center: Russian Painting, Artist unknown

At an Enneagram presentation a year or so ago, a question came up about being selfish.

Selfish is such a buzzword–especially for those of us who grew up as women in this culture, over the age of 30 or so…

We were taught that to be selfish–to be concerned about ourselves–was wrong. Our presence was valued when we were selfless–when our concern was for others.

Of course, this has not been true for most men. Men who focus on themselves and who talk about their accomplishments are most often seen as successful and strong.

Well, this woman shared a distinction she had heard, which I have been considering and sharing with my clients ever since.

Instead of worrying about what it means to be selfish, let’s consider being self-full.

Self-full. We can’t be self-full when we are being self-less!

We can’t develop the fullness of our voice and presence if we feel it’s wrong to be concerned with ourselves. (Thank us, women of the #metoo movement, for daring to share our voices.)

All the heroines and heros of our time have modeled being
self-full, not self-less.

They knew what they valued and loved. They knew what they needed–and they acted on it for themselves and for their greater communities.

We have to fill our own wells so we have water to share with others. This creates a self that is full, that over-brims with the water of life for all. This is being self-full, not self-less, or selfish!

 From this place, we meet the world with greater presence, which means we are more able to show up with what’s needed in the moment: more grace, strength, ease, equanimity, joy, power, love, etc.

My primary Enneagram teacher, Russ Hudson, once responded to a question from one of the Christian students about presence by saying “Whose Presence do you think it is, anyway?”

How do you fill your well
to be self-full?

What does self-less look like
in your life?

New Year, New Light, New Practices!

Remember with me for a moment what it was like for our ancestors, for some of us, even as close as our great-great grandparents…

 

As the Autumn passed, the days grew darker and darker.

After the harvest celebrations and the fields gone fallow, people cozied up together, sharing the warmth and the light of fire as the darkness grew deeper every day. They structured their lives around the light, sleeping when it was dark, up to 12 hours or more per night.

At the peak of darkness, when it seemed like its reign would never lose its grip, the people started to notice that, slowly but surely, the days were beginning to grow lighter again. They ventured out earlier and stayed out later…

The return of the light meant the return of life–of days warming, of plants starting to grow again, of animals mating and giving birth…

 

It’s no wonder that this season, regardless of which

religious celebration you participate in, is all about

waiting for and celebrating the return of the light.

 

This natural seasonal rhythm is built into our genes, passed down through thousands of years of biological, ancestral memory.

 

We celebrate that there is always a new spark of light–birthed right in the middle of the darkest of days. 

 

We celebrate that there is always an end to the depth of darkness.

 

We celebrate that there is always the light that returns again, bringing with it new growth and new life.

 

What new sparks of light within do you want to tend?

 

What new ways is your soul asking you to grow–to

open, to melt, to become more whole in the New Year?

 

Before we can nurture the new light, we have to first get clear on what we want–we must dream, vision, and imagine the life we want to live!

 

That’s what this dark time is meant for.

 

We sleep, we rest, we become more receptive to the life, the light that wants to live through us with practice, introspection, contemplation, meditation, prayer…

 

I have a perfect practice opportunity for you, one
that will support your sacred dreaming and visioning time.

 

Create space in your life through presence practices.

 

Feel more centered, more soulful, more connected.

 

Reconnect with your daily actions and make them into sacred ritual.

 

 

I’d LOVE to practice with you as a sacred beginning

to the New Year of more Light!

making life meaningful

“We are often tired and imbalanced not because we are doing too much, but because we are doing too little of what is most real and meaningful.”
~ Marianne Williamson

 

Moving into the holidays, we do get tired and imbalanced.

 

Most often, we ARE doing too much—

  • Working hard to earn the money we need to not only survive, but to buy gifts for our loved ones,
  • Making time for more connections with those we care about,
  • Decorating and creating a home environment that will help us shift into the mood for the holy-days…

 

And even though all of this is true, what if the problem were not really the “too much,” but the fact that we are not engaging with what is “most real and meaningful”?

 

The poet David Whyte tells a story that illustrates this in his book Crossing the Unknown Sea. He was working for a cause he loved, doing work he was good at, and feeling driven to work hard and make a difference in the world. But he was burned out, exhausted, and feeling disconnected from himself all the time. Reading poetry together, a friend gently commented that he was not exhausted from overwork, but from not living a wholehearted life. In his case, he was ignoring the inner call to step into his vocation as a poet. The harder he worked, even though it was for a good cause, the less time he made for what had meaning to him, what was most real.

 

What is most real and meaningful for you
during the holy-days?

How can you live a more wholehearted life right now?

 

My life and work are about meeting life exactly as it is and finding ways to be more present and mindful right in the midst of it all, in the thick of it.

 

Here are some simple ways you can practice presence in the life you are living right now, so that you can feel more meaning, more enjoyment, and more depth:

 

Another focus of attention to help you feel more meaning and purpose in your life is to mindfully engage with rituals that create a sacred container for your life.

These might be seasonal rituals, like the Holidays—perhaps you attend services, decorate your home, or celebrate the waning and waxing of the light. (If you’re in St. Paul, please join me for a Winter Solstice Celebration on December 21st.)

Or they could be practices you consciously engage with to create a sense of the sacred in each day, like you can find in my free Welcoming the Sacred E-Book.

 

If you’d like to practice in community, I’ve created a free, online 5-day Practice Presence for Life Journey for you! Join me to get on the right foot in the New Year and set yourself up with meaningful practices to help you live a more wholehearted life, every day.

Practicing Gratefulness

I taught a class on practicing gratitude just before Thanksgiving.

We explored how we can’t just assume an “attitude of gratitude,” but we can practice to be present, to open our heart, mind, and body to more gratefulness.

When we brainstormed how gratefulness / gratitude feels, there were so many ways we experience it on the inside. We feel connected, warm, loving, kind, happy, open, excited, tingly, uplifted, grounded, centered, accepting, positive, and more… 

What about you? How does gratefulness sense and feel to you?

These are all aspects of Who we truly are.

Of course we would want to be in touch with them! We can think about them as aspects of our Essence.

Your Essence is something that never goes away. It is an essential part of you, not changed by mood or anything that happens to you. It feels like home, like our birthright.

When we feel in touch with this, we can relax.

We know all will be well.

We make better decisions.

We trust life.

We talked about a lot of different ways to practice opening to gratefulness—from gratitude journals to thanking those who help you, from saying grace at meals to practicing random acts of kindness… The  one I’m going to try on in the New Year is a Gratitude Jar!

There are so many ways to open! 🙂

Please join me in the simple 3-minute body practice below to invite more opening–to help release the habitual contraction we hold in our bodies so that we can make space for more gratefulness and be more present.

Gratitude is a Presence Practice.

When we want something, we find a way to get it or work toward it, to practice.

We have to prioritize practicing gratefulness!

  • Not to get it right.
  • Not to reach some ultimate gratitude high.
  • But to be more present, to open our hearts—for ourselves and for the world.

If you want an opportunity to practice with me for a week, join the
free online 5-Day Practice Presence for Life Journey,
starting in January.

Set yourself up with a sacred and mindful start to the New Year!

#15daysofgrateful

We’ve passed Autumn Equinox, Halloween, and now Thanksgiving is coming, and after that the Winter Holidays and the New Year!!!

Every year, it feels like time begins to move ever more quickly just about now, doesn’t it?

Here in Minnesota, the second half of Fall is here. Overnight, the cold and graying blew in–we went from gorgeous blue skies and Indian Summer to hurrying to empty the rain barrels and rake the leaves, to winter coats and mitts, and to putting the garden to bed.

 

We have 15 days–if you include today–
to prepare our hearts for Thanksgiving.

 

Let’s use them to practice gratefulness!!

I’m choosing “gratefulness” instead of “gratitude” because it feels more active to me, even though they are both from the same root word, going back to Latin, gratus, or pleasing, agreeable, kind. Let’s practice creating these feelings in our bodysoul so that by the time Thanksgiving arrives, regardless of how quickly we are moving, the experience of gratefulness can shine through.

How it Works:

  • Every day, practice being grateful–for something as small as appreciating the 1st sip of tea or coffee or the soft, welcoming cocoon of your bed, to something as big as the fact that you are alive on this planet!
  • Here’s the key: Being grateful is not an idea in your mind, although your mind might help you come up with something to practice with.
    • In order to practice being grateful, you need to take the time to actually experience being grateful in your whole bodysoul. You need to feel the gratefulness. 
    • Where do you experience it in your body? What does it sense like?
    • How do you experience it in your heart (feelings)?
    • What happens in your mind (thoughts, quality of mind)?
    • Savor it, take it all the way in, infusing yourself with gratefulness as much as you can, from the tips of your toes to the top of your head!
  • Then post below and/or on your profile in Facebook with this tag: #15daysofgrateful.

I’ll begin: 

I am grateful that we finished painting our dining room! #15daysofgrateful

 

Ready, set, go!

 

If you want more support practicing being grateful, join me at my class, Practicing Gratitude, Sunday, November 19th from 1:00-2:30.

Gratitude heals your heart, helps your mind calm down, and even creates health in your body. So, why do we tend to wait until Thanksgiving to really focus on it? Join Holistic Life Coach Katy Taylor to learn not only the power of gratitude, but also hands-on practices you can take into your daily life.

 

I look forward to practicing with you!